Identity: Revisited

Streets of asphalt... streets of gold.

I was reading through some of my journal entries from a year ago, and I swear I don’t believe I actually wrote them. The maturity I expressed in my writings a year ago far outshines the musings of my heart now (or so I feel). Literally, I am in awe of who I’ve been. I remember every situation, I remember all the pain. Yet somehow through it all, the yearning of my heart remains the same: the abundant life.

bricks

The first words that come to mind looking at this are "foundation" and "time."

I am a citizen of heaven. I was made to walk on streets of gold. In the meantime, I will treat this asphalt as though it were gold. Let the eyes of my heart awake to wonder. I may not live in heaven right now, but I will very soon—why not act like I already do since that’s who I am?

Ah, yes, here is the tension I’ve been feeling. It masquerades as boredom. It veils the face of my Beloved. It traps my mind so that I cannot remember how a citizen of the kingdom thinks. Is it any surprise then that I’ve been asking myself who I am today? Looking back through pictures of myself from the last two years, I could not find any that reflected who I am now. I kept questioning and looking and nothing seemed to fit. So, I took some new pictures. Slowly now I remember who I am. I’ve been fighting for two years to not lose myself, and I almost lost. Abba, sustain me!

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2 thoughts on “Identity: Revisited

    • Yes, surrendering to God is the first step to entering into the kingdom. It’s amazing to think about how much bigger God is than we realize Him to be, and even more amazing to actually experience Him!

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